Author's note: Many of the posts contained within this blog are personal memoirs. They are mine. They are real. I wrote them as I experienced them. If any story is at all fictional or needs to be attributed to someone else, I will state that firmly in the first paragraph.
Showing posts with label Society. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Society. Show all posts

Wednesday, April 18, 2012

Fearsome Feminism

Yesterday a friend of mine stopped by my place.  She’s an avid feminist, be that for better or worse in your opinion.  Last night we found ourselves in an interesting predicament.  One of my roommates, a tall Catholic hailing from Cameroon, asked her what she is studying.  She told him, and also mentioned that she’ll be graduating this summer and then heading off to grad school.  I sat back to watch the conversation, not really expecting what was to come next.
“But if you go to grad school in the fall, won’t that be a lot of school without a break?” he asked.
Casually, she replied, “Sure, but I love studying.  I wish I could keep studying forever.”
“Yes,” he said, “but you know you have other things to think about.”
At this point I nearly choked on my drink.  Knowing her opinion on such things, I placed my chin on my fist, grinned as cheesily as possible, and asked her, “Yes, don’t you have other things to be thinking about?”
She easily heard the thick layers of sarcasm in my voice, cast me a hellish glare, and instead of giving me my sought reaction, proceeded to respond to my roommate.  Looking again toward him, she asked one simple question, “What do you mean?”
Rarely have I seen someone as confused by a woman as my roommate was last night, and never before had I seen my friend even remotely as angry as she was on this occasion.  Suffice it to say that their conversation ended a short time later in an uneasy stalemate.
The reason I bring this up is simple: obviously we are all biased.  I am definitely biased, my roommate is biased, and my friend is equally biased.  You, reader, are too.  Bias is a word today that has inherited an extremely negative connotation.  When we watch the news, listen to politicians, or hear about outrageous court decisions, we also often hear angry tirades accusing one source or another of being biased.  Biased has come to be an insult which leaves an utterly bitter aftertaste in the shadow of today’s polarized political and religious climates.  I suppose this insulting nature almost makes a certain amount of sense, seeing as how being biased has unfortunately become synonymous with being uninformed in one way or another.  Of course I’d like to think that I’m fairly well informed, but I suppose there’s plenty of room for debate on that point.  If my education so far has left me with anything that I really value, one of those things would be the realization that there is no such thing as an unbiased view, and another would be that one of the most important things we can do is recognize and come to terms with our own biases.
While my friend and my roommate were having their discussion, I struggled with what to do.  I thought about intervening on the side of my friend – with whom I strongly agreed – but then held my tongue in order to let her defend herself, for I knew that she would have little trouble doing so.
This is my blog, and I reserve the right to state my biased opinion without having to write down the biased opinion of anyone else.  I respect feminism, and I truly believe that no one should feel restricted in their possibilities due to their sex or gender.  If yesterday’s conversation did anything for me, it reminded me how strongly biases can affect our lives.  I fear that I associate so often with like-minded people that I may be losing touch with that fact.  Bias is alive and well, so do what you will about it.  Fight it, embrace it, or try to ignore it.  Either way, we all have to move on at the end of the day and get up again tomorrow.

Tuesday, June 21, 2011

Was this what we meant to do?

I've been musing on the state of our society lately, so don't read this if you hate hypothetical situations and purely unanswerable questions. Let me begin by saying that I like America; I don't necessarily love it, but I will say that I'm fairly attached, just not unconditionally so. I enjoy having a car to get wherever I feel like going, I like having running water and plumbing, and I don't mind having a phone with which I can contact whomever I need at the push of a button. I like these things, but what about the cost-to-benefit ratio?
What am I talking about? Bear with me and I'll tell you. Now let's speak hypothetically for a moment. How much does it cost to live? Let's say you're an American living in a relatively inexpensive region of the country, such as where I live. To keep things as cheap as possible, let's pose that you're single, have no children, have no mortgage, no car payment, no credit card bills, and no medical payments. Now let's say that you have found some VERY cheap rent somewhere for $200/mo, and you only spend $50 dollars on your cell phone bill and insurance each month (I know, that's about as cheap as can be fathomed, but this is hypothetical). Actually, drop the phone: you don't need that. Okay, so let's say you're in $200 for rent, $25 for insurance, and $50 for basic utilities. And tag on another $75 per month for gas and food. That's about as cheap as I can imagine anyone living in this country. $200 + $25 + $50 + $75 = $350. So, at the absolute minimum it will cost an American $350/month just to exist.
Now I'm not saying that the world sucks and is out to get us, I only think that occasionally. What I'm saying is that the $350 cost is the absolute minimum and almost everyone has expenses far higher than that. People get up each day, spend most of that day working at a job that they've hopefully learned to tolerate, and then go home to spend a few hours at the home they work so hard to pay for. Our society revolves around earning enough to exist. No one planned for our society to become this way, and there's no turning back now, but is this what we really want? Are we really better off than the pioneers of 200 years ago? Or the free-ranging tribes of a few millennia ago? Sure, the government we pay so much to exist supposedly protects us and our rights from oppression, and with enough money you can now pay to extend your life, but do the benefits really outweigh the costs?
If I could reduce my standard of living in order to radically reduce my cost of existence, you bet I would. I'm just not sure anymore if the trajectory our society has placed itself on is the right one. Buy a car, buy a home, buy health insurance so you can afford kids, buy a TV, buy internet, buy a phone, buy a nicer car than your neighbor's, buy a bigger home for the extra kids, buy more food, buy dental insurance, accrue some harmless debt, buy some more stuff, and then spend 25 years enjoying your assorted outdated items and trying to pay off your debts until you kick the bucket. Was all the work and worry worth it? I don't know because I don't own much, but it doesn't seem like it to me. It's a shame that the whole world is in such a hurry to follow our lead.